A Very Bad Date: Resolving Interpersonal Conflicts

I have been in a serious relationship with B for over a year. Punctuality was among the major issues in our relationship woes. While punctuality was one of my weaknesses (I was seldom punctual for most of my appointments or dates!), B values punctuality very much.

The incident I will be describing took place four months ago. It was Friday afternoon when B asked me out to catch a movie with him. As I did not have any plans that evening, I agreed to meet him at 7pm at Dhoby Ghaut MRT Station.

However, I had an urgent assignment to attend to an hour after I hung up the call from B. Figuring that I would be able to complete the task and manage to meet him on time, I did not find the need to inform B about the situation.

Alas, it was already 6:20pm after I completed the assignment. As I rushed off to the bus stop, I sent a short message to B, letting him know the possibility of me being late, while assuring him that I was making my way there, hoping that he would understand. I felt rather uneasy as there were past incidences when I was late for our dates - he often showed visible signs of annoyance.

I was aghast when I discovered the long lines of vehicles caught in the heavy traffic jam as I reached the bus stop. Needless to say, I was late for the date again!

I arrived at the MRT station at 7:20pm. B was waiting for me impatiently at the main entrance. Suddenly - as I approached him - B took long quick strides away from me. I stood rooted at my position, utterly stunned by his behaviour. Several moments passed before anger surged through me. I was furious at B for being unreasonable and for not giving me the opportunity to explain myself before jumping to conclusions. At that instant, I stormed back to the MRT platform and took the next train home.

A couple of days passed and there was still no news from B. If you were in my shoes, what would you do to tackle this situation? Or even better, what could be done to prevent this episode from happening?

We have resolved this issue sometime back but I would like to listen to your opinion. Some parts of the story have been modified to suit the needs of this blog entry.

On second thoughts, looking back at the title of the entry, was this even a date? =)

Of Scary Lab Partners: Why Communicate Effectively?

"No man is an island." Communication is part and parcel of our daily lives as we meet and interact with people from all walks of life, be it our family members back at home, the auntie selling yong tauhu in the canteen, or our coursemates in the university. However, it is not unusual for communication breakdown to occur, resulting in conflicts and misunderstandings, which can impede work progress and ruin relationships. Therefore, effective communication is a "living skill", vital for one to succeed in both his/her personal and professional endeavours.

To communicate effectively is particularly essential in order to work well together as a group or a team. One situation that I still recall vividly happened during my first semester in NUS. Mr. M and I were assigned laboratory partners for two modules then. Although he is now one of my close friends in Singapore, our friendship did not kick off well. In fact, it was horrible. He strode into the laboratory on the first day with a hostile expression and sat next to me, totally ignoring my presence. The subsequent laboratory sessions with Mr. M were nerve-racking. As I was rather intimidated by him, I talked less and spoke softer. However, the more I did that, the more annoyed he got with me! He reckoned that I was not interested in contributing to our labwork! Reflecting back, it was a pretty amusing situation. Nonetheless, it is evident here that such conflicts can be prevented with better communication skills.

Besides that, effective communication skills are required in a myriad of work settings. I hope to enhance my communication skills through this module. True enough, having paper qualifications may help me secure a job, but possessing effective communication skills will boost my employability and marketability, providing me more opportunities for advancing in my future career.

In a nutshell, I believe that good communication skills are becoming increasingly important for me to establish healthier personal relationships and to develop my future career.





Photosource: http://www.sexualhealthcentresaskatoon.ca/